The Only Constant Is Change

It’s almost autumn. The trees are preparing for the changing colors and coming winter. Families are scrambling with back to school preparations. College age students are packing and planning for the transition to college, often moving hundreds, sometimes thousands of miles away. Parents are preparing for potential work/life balance shifts that come with the commencement of academic endeavors, whether for the children or the adults as a component of continuing education. Days begin to get shorter. Time appears less concise, less organized, more stressed. Needless to say, this is a time of transition. Transition, for some, also means loss. For every change, it is important to also acknowledge that there is also an ending, and a beginning. The summer will end, the autumn will begin. An academic endeavor is ending, and a new one – or employment opportunity – will begin. This may sound trite, and simple as a construct, however often, we struggle with the mixed emotions which accompany these life transitions. Moreover, sometimes as we navigate out thoughts and feelings, we sometimes get caught up in self-doubt, sadness, self-deprecation and even grief or pain.

First and foremost – you are not alone. Additionally, it is often helpful to take a moment to acknowledge the feelings of loss which accompany transitional experiences. For example, it is O.K. to acknowledge the sadness which accompanies the child moving to college. The ending of events as a family under one roof, the difference in mealtime routine, the conversations had – or not. The feeling of loss which accompanies the empty room. This is a form of grief, and grief deserves its time. We grieve because we feel, and we feel because we love. Honor the grief because we honor the love. Nurture the emotions as you move through to new experiences, and allow space for each, because each are part of growth. Love is a verb – it is something we get to do. As such, those feelings, loss, grief, uncertainty, anxiety, and even fear, are the natural causal emotions which are borne from the shifts of love. Supports can be ever helpful. Share what you are feeling and thinking. Give testimony to the transition, to the perception of loss which accompanies it. Utilizing items which provide you connection –called linking bonds – can also be helpful as they allow us to engage in memories and gratitude. If the transition feels overwhelming, sometimes therapy can assist with the processing of the transition and garnering of tools and strategies toward increased awareness of one’s self-narrative, as well as triggers which might be impactful. At the end of the day, as Heraclites of Ephesus stated long ago, the only constant is change.

 © 2025: Donna J Clarke/Integrative Pathways Counseling, LLC. All rights reserved.